For those of you who are unaware of rule 34 here it is.

If it exists, there is porn of it. No exceptions.

For proof of that rule I give you Cream of Wheat porn. If you are under 18 don’t watch.

Happy Zombie Jesus day.

~JN

I started watching the video thinking wouldn’t it be funny if Major Nelson had run into the Outland Steampunk Crew. Then a couple of seconds in I got my answer. If you don’t know any of them you can see one of their members in a short film directed by another friend of mine that won the chance to compete at the Atlanta Campus Movie Fest. Professor Dantes and the Severin Conundrum

It’s good fun seeing my friends all so busy while I’ve been laid up sick as a dog.

~JN

Guard you toodles from this old woman.

~JN

16 seconds in and you will see what makes it so difficult to be an on location reporter.

~JN

Bionic Commando was one of my favorite games as a child. The new version doesn’t really have me too excited yet. However, a redone version of the original makes me so happy and I can’t wait for it to hit xbox live.

~JN

Disintegrator.co.uk

Do I even need to say anything about this. No. It speaks for itself.

~JN

Kataude mashin gâru, AKA The One-Armed Machine Girl

Here we have a movie filled with a mutilated schoolgirl, yakuza, ninjas, excessive violence, and a drill bra. If that doesn’t sound like the setup for one of the most perfect films of all times I don’t know that I want to go to the movies with you. The only thing missing from the story is zombies. However this is just the trailer and there is still time for some serious zombie goodness. Throw in the fact that the schoolgirl in questions seriously looks like she could give Ash from the Evil Dead series a run for his money and it really just screams out for some zombie goodness.

Would zombies make it too perfect though, maybe if the ninjas were replaced by zombies that would make it better but keep it from ending the entire film industry by creating a movie that cannot be topped. Anyway, ninjas can always be replaced with zombies.

Back to the subject at hand though. The only true problem I see with this movie is that it isn’t out yet. It doesn’t come out in Japan till next year, then we have to wait for a translation. Then we will have to wait for Tarantino to decide to bring it over here in a dubbed form. I can trust Tarantino to be all over this thing and have enough sense to just bring it over and not try to do some horrible American remake with Sarah Michelle Gellar.

Now we just have to wait until next year to see if this can take the title of most perfect movie ever.

~JN

It’s things like this that make me love the internet.

~JN

via Ectomo

All heil Technoviking.

~JN

So, the basic idea here is that Satan is currently or will in the future pose as an Alien race that will be friendly and beneficial to earth. But, it’s actually all a ruse on his part to trick us when the second coming happens. Since he is our friend and has helped us so much when Jesus and the angels descend from heaven Satan will convince the world leaders that Jesus is the first wave of an alien armada come to invade earth and that we have to destroy him. Thus the entire world will unite to rise up against God.

There is also something in there about an alien/human hybrid that is the antichrist.

I love crazy people and their crazy ideas. These guys rank up there with the people who believe lizard men are actually controlling the world in my book. The only reason they reach that level though is because they tied it into a religion that has millions of stupid people already following it willing to believe in something this crazy. Trust me they will believe, there are a lot of them that believe the National ID card idea being kicked around the US government is actually the mark of the beast. Idiots, thats just the mark of a weak nation giving it’s government too much power.

~JN